My relationship with Ohli
UR.
Individual Exterior
I do, my actions, my body, physical health, all I can see or touch, in time and space, skills, physical location, climate,...
The biggest challenge I have is the time lack, I'm spending now much of it with Ohli, and not just time also all levels of my energy. There are times when I feel completely absorbed and that can lead me to frustration, especially when my energy is low.
I love when I wake up in the morning with energy and time to devote to him, I like to go with him for a walk to get "drunk" of stimulus, had fun looking mushrooms and discover the wonders of nature.
Now I'm his closer male figure and I am a big influence on his development, now he copy everything he see in us and I have a big responsibility in the attitudes and actions that I take, that at his early age can have an influence for the rest of his life. Being with him all the time can be very intense for both, and we need our personal space to unwind from time to time. I've noticed that when we are on the road travelling the coexistence between us is more difficult, normally during this time period we live in small spaces, usually a room where we are on top of each other. When we have two rooms it's creates more moments in which we can live our independence and disconnect from each other. |
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We in a imaginary car race
We slept in separate rooms at the most critical moments in my lack of sleep and fatigue accumulated, so I can recharge batteries to get back to him energetically.
I'm not proud of some of the things I do like smoking, don't look much after my health, .... Big details that can not let me feel confidence to take a child education responsibility, it´s like pushing my limits towards unknown margins.
If we have a routine to follow is easier for him to recognize and be present about the different actions that we repeat everyday. Almost like a ritual can be Dinner + hot bath + wash teeth + story = sweet dreams.
But follow routines is difficult when you're travelling and that makes our biorhythms be out of adjustment constantly, it´s not good to feed him late or put him to bed if he haven't had a little time for him, this can cause stress to him that affects all of us.
Magic Pizza.
I try to give him a lot of independence, sometimes I let him go alone without him realize that I'm looking after, I love to see his reactions when he gets into his world and goes to full fill his personal mission, as buying chocolate or whatever. I observe the attitude he has crossing the street without fear, he can go so far away that at the end always I'm who have to stop him on his out of margins to nowhere journey.
I can see that I have to lead myself to another level in my unconditional love feeling towards him, and transmute the sacrifice moments to a blessing.
Every time we know better each other makes our interactions easier, I feel very lucky that Ohli is a wonderful little person and I see no evil in him, his innocence acts inspire me to live a purer life in which sometimes my busy adult mind leaves no room for the hiding surprises around.